Quieter

A little knitting.

Knitting littles.

Signs of Spring.

Things have been remarkably quiet here on This Side. The days keep flowing into one another and here we are again in the Spring roller coaster. 80 degrees one day, sleet the next. A couple nights ago we were under a tornado watch. It’s only March, so this will happen a few more times before summer settles in. Interestingly, while a good part of the country has been buried in snow this year, the other night I saw on the weather that we have had a record mild winter in regard to snowfall and cold. I think I’ve only worn a coat once. The rest of the time I’ve gotten by with just a sweater.

After what feels like a deep hibernation the last couple of months I was suddenly brought back to life when the Oldest Child landed in the hospital for another 12 days with a flareup of crohn’s. This time we saw a perforation in her colon and spent a nail-biting 4 days determining whether she would have surgery and how much, if not all, of her colon she could lose. This time she got off easily by waiting and in the end it healed itself. Massive antibiotics and pain meds –  but a miss is as good as a mile, right? What a terrible disease this is!

Yesterday was the Second Sunday in Lent, if you follow these things. It’s been years since I followed the practice of “giving something up” for Lent – but each year I DO try to focus on something that might better myself or those around me. This year I’ve been thinking a lot about how much time I spend in front of electronics: TV, cell phone, computer. I’ve been trying for a while to cut back, and what better time than now?  Now, when so many of my friends and family seem to be in need of special thoughts and prayers, how can I justify hours spend watching frivolous TV shows and playing games on a computer. I spend all of my working day in front of a computer screen. There are certainly better uses for the rest of my time. For Lent I’m determined to restrict my viewing time to the 8 hours a day at work – provided we are not threatened with tornados in the neighborhood when turning on the weather channel might be prudent.

The truth is, being a hard-core introvert, I thrive on quiet. A part of me wants to be outgoing and sparkling but if I’m to be true to myself I have to accept the fact that I’m just NOT.  You know what? That’s OK. Being an introvert in an extrovert world means I have to deflect a lot of well-intentioned entreaties from family and friends to “get involved” with things, and believe me, I’ve tried. I’m realizing though, how much more alive I actually feel when I’m living my own way with my involvement coming in through the back door. While I have great admiration for the energy of younger women these days, I’ve decided I’m just as energetic – but in a quieter way.

Maybe, in the end, the bravery I admire in young women today doesn’t have so much to do with WHAT they are doing in terms of travel and adventure, but more with the idea that they are finding their own unique rhythms. That said – anytime we can find our own niche’ and know where we belong is a moment to celebrate. Don’t you think?